Human beings are hoarders of life. We keep animals as pets, dozens of plants, some of us have an ungodly amount of children (“one or more”). I think it’s bizarre. It’s weird that humans keep animals around. Haha. Don’t you think?
I’ll stop smoking now.
I just saw a movie trailer for Final Destination 5. Enough already. How many “final” destinations can there be? The real answer is only one. After that it’s a continuing journey. I think the makers of these movies meant to title them something else, but “Neverending Story” was already taken.
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I want Burger King to start selling eyeshadow. Then I could mix and match and have it “my way.” I think the Maybellines and Revlons out there purposely pair perfectly normal coppery and golden tones with prostitute pinks and mermaid hooker turquoise color blocks so that we’re forced to buy two or three shadow palettes to get the desired color combinations we want. “Instead of pairing copper, gold, and bronze, let’s pair copper, gold, and Finding Nemo orange so that they have to spend another $8 on another compact with bronze with lime green in it, lolol!” they scheme. Assholes.
They win though. They always do.
The phrase “It’s all downhill from here” is confusing to me. At first, it sounds negative, like it only gets worse from here. But really, it means things are “looking up” and getting better. Going downhill is much easier than going uphill. They really took us for a spin with these ups and downs connotations though, didn’t they?
Connotations is a hard word to spell.
I used the phrase “to the max” the other day out loud. I was embarrassed. Not as embarrassed as this guy is going to be when he finds a three-way mirror:
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I just discovered Sheetz french fries. This is a problem, because they are delicious and are sold in buckets. It is also a problem because Sheetz is in walking distance from my house.
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Okay. I’m going. I’ll be going now. I’m taking off. I’m going to take off.
(my clothes)
Come on guys, that’s perverted.
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“I sharted driving home from a friend’s tonight. Life gets easier, right?”
Hot filling: