Tag Archives: Jonathan Taylor Thomas


22 Jul

There is a child just outside the apartment below me just absolutely screaming its head off. It is making the most offensive, wretched sound I have ever heard come from a human being ever before in my life. It sounds like it’s on fire. Do normal people gasp with sympathy, “I wonder what’s wrong—I hope he’s okay!” ? Because I am wondering what I could do to end its life while minimizing any major cleanup or legal consequences afterward. If it would just stop making that horrid, dreadful sound. Until it ceases to project this detestable sound however, I am going to start brewing up death threats to call down to its parent-figure one floor below.

Why do children have to be so god-awful? Don’t they understand that no one likes screeching? Nobody wants a wailing, noisy child around. No one. Don’t kids want to be liked? Isn’t that why they start doing drugs so early nowadays, to fit in? Why haven’t they caught on? Is there no reasoning with children? Don’t they comprehend that shrieking like a howler monkey is only going to make them grossly unpopular and probably spanked in public? Ugh. I wish paddling children was still socially acceptable and not considered child endangerment/abuse. I think it would really cut down on the fit-throwing that children insist on. Continue reading