Teen Mum.

7 Jul

I think the show would be funnier with a British twist to it.

Status:

Someone:  teen mom premire

Comment:  i been waiting for thisssssssss

I don’t think further commentary is necessary.

I’m really tired of Kaplan “University” advertising that they can turn 19 year old girls on their second unplanned pregnancy into RNs in 12 months. What a joke. A “university” that is located in the middle of a shopping mall should tip you off, for starters. If you can buy Hello Kitty purses, eat Burger King, and get an “education” in one convenient location, you probably aren’t headed for the glorious fields of success. I worked at Taco John’s in the Mall of the Bluffs where a Kaplan University was located for six years. I know all of these things to be factual.

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Slapping a pair of powder blue scrubs on 200 pound Qu’aneisha with her hooker-esque curling purple nails does not make her a nurse. It doesn’t make me want her to draw my blood or check my blood pressure. Put her back behind the counter to serve chicken nuggets like she’s qualified to do.

.

.

It’s not racist if it’s true. I have a friend named Daniel who would agree.

Extra hilarious side note:  I Googled images of “black nurse” and didn’t come up with much of anything (obviously), so I then Googled “Latisha in scrubs,” and found the above photo. Hahaha.

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I hate it when couples say, “We’re not trying, but we’re not doing anything to prevent it” when referring to pregnancy. This is complete bullshit. If you’re “not doing anything to prevent becoming pregnant,” you’re “trying.” I can close my eyes and drive down the interstate and say that “I’m not trying” to crash my car into a median and die, but the fact of the matter is, I am. Refusing to take your birth control and not wrapping your tool is asking for twins. You’re not fooling anyone. Just come out with it.

Every time I make a joke about Rebecca Black’s “song” Friday, the terrible lyrics (if you can call them that) latch onto my brain for hours and hours. By simply titling my last post “Fryday, Fryday,” I’ve unintentionally sentenced myself to a terrible day, repeating that stupid, whiny song over and over in my head. It’s like an inescapable virus. It’s the “Black” Plague.

I’m so clever it hurts.

We, we, we, so excited. We so excited. We gonna have a ball, to-night.

EVERYBUDDAY!!

Well, that’s all I’ve got right now. THAT’S ALL I’VE GOT.

Bye.

_______________________________________________________________________

“Fine. I got a cat. Release the Cracken.”

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One Response to “Teen Mum.”

  1. Rahul October 14, 2012 at 1:15 am #

    I’m a doc and I see a lot of these “nurses” every day. They are very rude and arrogant, and have no idea what they’re doing!

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