Ready, Set, SCRABBLE!

5 Feb

HOLA, all. Of course when I say “all” I’m referring to all humans. This is excluding racial minorities, and of course Kehly. So Kehly, Yao Ming—get back to the litter box. This forum is for people. Winter break has been phenomenal. Christmas was jolly, Taco John’s didn’t suck, Steamboat kicked A, Judith’s wedding was a gas, and alas, it is time to head back east to the City de Iowa, or “Iowa City” for the English-speaking population.

Originally my plan was to leave Council Bluffs tomorrow morning around 10 a.m. and get to town before 2, resign our apartment lease, and get back on the road and head to Ames where I will drink alcohol by the barrel until Monday. Now, depending on when this snowman stops shitting all over the Midwest, I might not be able to leave until Friday. We’ll see.

During the past month, I have rekindled a passionate spark for Scrabble. I went from not touching a single letter tile in four years to being clinically addicted to rearranging letters in my head. Not only have I been replacing (some) nights of binge drinking with game nights, and playing multiple back-to-back Scrabble marathons with my biological mother, but I have also downloaded it to my phone and play it before bed, in the bathroom, at red lights—I can’t stop. I have a problem.

ANYway, I am parched. I need to go lap up water.

I think oranges were named before carrots.
“What’s that?”
—Orange. Oranges.
“..Then what’s this?”
..Oh shit.

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