The exact time right now is 9:44 a.m. on a day that I don’t have class, and I’m awake. I haven’t seen an hour before 11 a.m. since Kehly was thin, and trust me, that’s a CONSIDERABLE amount of time. The reason for my disgusting hour of awakening is again due to my raging allergies. It’s horrible, team. I don’t know if I can make you understand with words alone. My sleepless night was spent focusing on my blocked air passages, which in turn actually caused pressure and pain in my eyes, which didn’t help any. I’m going to need a tracheaotomy. I’m awake, unable to convert air into carbon dioxide, a.k.a. breathe.
I’m dying. Send flowers.
Last night I had a nightmare that it was the first day of summer vacation, so naturally I wanted all my friends to party, but everyone was like, “No, the new Star Wars movie is coming out.” Naturally I was very annoyed, and proceeded to drive through my neighborhood to return home and wallow in self pity. On my journey down my street, there were tons and tons of kids coming out of their houses dressed in Star Wars costumes, and their parents were packing them overnight bags so they could stay at the theater. I mocked them and started taking pictures. The end.
Jim Flowers, otherwise known as Marcus Howland has recently informed me that the high today is 79, which I would have been excited about if it didn’t mean that the high for Mayflower would be 89. We’re all going to die, kids. Write your wills. Don’t be afraid to leave me a little something.
Sorry, Kehly said that.
“You have a narky laugh!”