I Don’t Read Good.

3 Feb

Well, the studying is going strong, like Kehly’s body odor, for example. Actually so far I’ve only focused on chemistry because it rapes me in the arse like a wild donkey. I have my lit exam tomorrow, and the only things I can really do to prepare are ‘re-read’ (you’ve got to be kidding me) the novels and plays we read. I am NOT re-reading Hamlet. You couldn’t pay me enough money to re-read it. I didn’t even read it in the first place! Even if I SparkNoted it again, it’d take longer than I’d like, meaning longer than 3 minutes. I didn’t actually read ANY of the books we were supposed to read for this term, including Sula, Pride & Prejudice, and Hamlet. In fact, I wrote a 7 page paper over Pride & Prejudice, and I didn’t crack it open once, except of course to find quotes to add in my paper. I’m kind of hoping I can just wing it, but Jeff Doty is a sly character, and he’ll throw in essay questions from out of this world, and “winging it” just won’t work.

Plus I think he hates me.

I’m in the ITC, and it is full of Asians right now. There’s an oriental to my left that has been chattering away in Chinese like a little Asian chipmunk for the past 47 minutes exactly. Plus she smells like old people and Instant Ramen. I’m slightly distracted, also see “irritated.” I know why people feel prompted to engage in genocide.

Just kidding Susie Kim/Jennifer Yu/Jackie Chan/that guy from Van Wilder.

Anyway, I’m going to go ahead and hit los libros again. yay.



“Cross-eyed Asian baby in front of me. Do I shoot?”


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