3 Feb

It’s getting out of hand. I’m up to 2 to 3 packs a day now, often times an entire pack at once. It’s become a chain-habit. One never satisfies. It’s become a serious addiction:

My name is Rebecca Sheppard, and I am addicted to Orbit Bubblemint chewing gum. I have resorted to purchasing economy-sized crates of this delicious gum (see below). I’ve already gone through two of them, meaning 24 packages, totalling 288 pieces, in the three short weeks I’ve been at school. It’s out of control. It’s mayhem. My teeth are going to fall out.

At least it’s sugar-free.

Helio: Don’t Call It A Phone.

Alright kids. This has been not only confusing me but bothering me for quite some time now. If this hand-held device with text messaging, picture messaging, and above all, wireless phone service is not a “phone,” then what in the dickens would you classify it as? It’s not a television set. It isn’t a radio. It’s not an alarm clock or a computer or a microwave-oven. The only logical and appropriate answer would be a “phone.” Also see “cellular phone.” Perhaps one of the marketing ants at the company came up with the slogan, and the CEO, hung over, divorced, and not caring if it made sense, thought it sounded good and gave them the go-ahead. Meanwhile, I will call it a phone, and argue with anyone who says otherwise.

I’m off to do miscellaneous activities. Probably sitting. Sitting is at the top of the list.

“Captain Fucking Kangaroo.”


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